Friday, September 28, 2007

Laura "Tagged" Me....

So I think I am supposed to answer these questions about my hubby - how fun!

1. Who is your man? Jay
2. How long have you been together? 5 and 1/2 years
3. How long did you date? just under 3 years - we got married 4.2.05
4. How old is your man? 30 years old (3 days younger than me)
5. Who eats more? We both love to eat, but I think he eats more.
6. Who said "I love you" first? Jay (3 months after we met)
7. Who is taller? Jay, by over a foot
8. Who sings better? Jay, but he seldom gets the words right.
9. Who is smarter? I always say I am, but we are both pretty smart.
10. Whose temper is worse? Jay's is worse - he likes to have tt's over small things.
11. Who does the laundry? ME! I think he has maybe done 5 loads of laundry in the time I have known him.
12. Who takes out the garbage? Usually Jay
13. Who sleeps on the right side of the bed? I do - it is closer to the nursery and we know he isn't getting up in the night.
14. Who pays the bills? I do.
15. Who is better with the computer? We both are computer literate.
16. Who mows the lawn? He does.
17. Who cooks dinner? We both do. He is a better cook.
18. Who drives when you are together? We both do. He usually whines so I will drive, unless I "forget" my glasses.
19. Who pays when you go out? Jay
20. Who is the most stubborn? We are both pretty stubborn, but he usually says "sorry" first.
21. Who is the first to admit when they are wrong? See question #20
22. Whose parents do you see the most? both sets - we live exactly in the middle
23. Who kissed who first? Jay kissed me first, on our first "real" date.
24. Who asked who out? Jay asked me out. Our first date was drinks in Federal Hill. We hung out a few times before that!
25. Who proposed? Jay did on 4.11.04 in the Philadelphia Airport - he had a sign when I got off the plane.
26. Who is more sensitive? I am
27. Who has more friends? We both have a lot of close friends
28. Who has more siblings? ME. He has a brother and I have two sisters and two brothers.
29. Who wears the pants in the family? Jay likes to "think" he does!

Monday, September 24, 2007

Date Night

Tonight Jay had a work dinner, so Alex and I went out on a date. We went to Cheeburger Cheeburger and had a blast. As we sat singing to the oldies blaring on the radio and drawing pictures on the back of the menu, the same question kept going through my mind....

What could be better than this??
Answer: ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!

He is so much fun. It is so incredible to be able to talk to him and have him understand and talk back. I kept thinking, "Here I am having a conversation with my little boy!" He even ordered for himself tonight.
At the end of our date, the waitress took our picture and Alex gave me a kiss. And if you could have seen him drink an entire chocolate milkshake all by himself....so what if he only ate a cup of applesauce and half a grilled cheese....he really enjoyed every last drop of that milkshake.

By the way - today is the first day of fall and all is right with MY world.

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Blessings

We have been so busy the last few days (or I should say months). Alex is on the go constantly. Between going to Stroller Strides, My Gym, the playground, walking around our neighborhood, and dancing to the Wiggles, we are always on the move!

Yesterday we were outside the house and Alex was collecting his usual sticks, leaves, rocks, and grass from the yard. I was sitting on the front steps just watching him explore. It is amazing to me how time is flying by.... He is such a little man. He is confident and fearless. He wants to go on the big boy slide at the playground, and do everything "myself" as he says. I really try to just take him in...it is so wonderful to be able to learn everything again through his eyes. And what beautiful eyes they are - when he smiles his eyes light up and my heart fills up!

And as busy as we are and as fast as time is going by, I try each day to just memorize a little more of him. This is our time. My little boy and me. I will never have it back again. So each night as I read to him I hug him tight, and when he asks me to read "another one," I don't say no, because one day all too soon this time will be over. And as I put him in his crib and kiss him goodnight, I always say, "May God bless you," and as I walk away I always add, "because he sure has blessed me."

Thursday, September 13, 2007

Just a Thought

I think Alex is the most adorable and brilliant child in the world. He is a blessing and a joy and maybe I am biased but I don't care!
P.S. - I think my hubby is pretty darn cute too!

My Brain is on Overdrive

I am a thinker, a planner, an organzier. I am who I am, and I can't help it. My family teases me terribly, but there is nothing I can do to change it.

Question: So why would I be any different now that we are trying to get pregnant with #2?

Answer: I wouldn't be any different, because if I could I would. I am an information-seeking fiend. I am on the internet looking up TTC (that's trying to conceive) websites every chance I get. Do you know there is one called TWO WEEK WAIT.com? That is the two week wait between ovulation and your period! Gotta love it, I do. Jay doesn't even have to set his alarm for work anymore. He wakes up to the sound of my thermometer beep..beep...beeping. And when it comes to peeing on a stick, whether it be an Ovulation Predictor or a Home Pregnancy Test , I am an addict.

Now we are onto Day 2, Cycle #3 of this process. And I feel like I can't slow down much less stop on my quest for information. The questions race through my brain:

What is going on with my body? What can I do to maximize my chances this month? Why was it so easy with Alex? Why did I get pregnant in May just to lose the baby? Are Jay's boxer briefs too tight? How can I stop stressing and worrying?

The last question is a pointless one - because anyone who has tried to conceive knows that it is the one thing you hear most; "relax...don't stress...let it happen" and the thing that is the most impossible to do! Because if it could just happen it would have already, for me and for my friends sailing along in the same boat with me. As the months go by, the stress level goes up and my brain has officially slipped into Overdrive. Knowledge is power to me, it helps me make sense of the senseless. So maybe I shouldn't question why I am the way I am or what I can do to change it but instead just go along for the ride. And along the way I am going to pick up as much knowledge as my brain can hold (and that is a lot if I must say so myself!)

Saturday, September 8, 2007

An acre and a 1/4

Yesterday, Jay (my hubby) and I became the proud owners of an acre and a 1/4 of land filled with trees, rocks, and probably many small animals and insects. Move over creatures because the Beynons are moving in! We are planning to break ground in six months so we are in the process of picking out house plans. Talk about a daunting task. Lucky for us we have an amazing builder - my dad - yes, here I go singing his praises again.

WOW! I can't believe we actually own property in Baltimore County. I never thought it would happen. Growing up the daughter of a builder I have always dreamed of having my dad build a house from scratch for my family. And now it is going to happen. Jay says he is going to help in the evenings and weekends, which will be cute. I bet he will look pretty adorable in a tool belt. Maybe Alex can get his own little tool belt and help too! Now that would be a picture - my 3 favorite guys building the Queen (that would be me) her castle!

Thursday, September 6, 2007

Why?

As I mentioned in my previous post, my grandmother died a year ago. We were very close and I miss her everyday. I know she would get such a kick out of Alex. Anyway, I digress. The other night my dad made me clean out the one closet I still occupied in my childhood room, which is now an office...but again I digress.

I threw most everything out but saved photo albums, my first pair of point shoes, my $125 wedding shoes (that were on my feet for a total of one hour - they didn't even make it out of the church), my Cabbage Patch kids, and a handful of the many letters that my grandma wrote to me when I was away at college.

So I got home and I read the letters,and it could probably go without saying, but I cried my eyes out! Because I miss her? yes! Because I wish she could be here to watch my son grow? yes! But more than that, I cried because I felt her here with me now as I read those letters from 11 years ago! One of the letters was dated March 10, 1996. In the letter she told me that my mom had told her that my boyfriend of 3 years and I had broken up, and she wanted to let me know she was there for me. And I must have written right back pouring my heart out about how heartbroken I was and asking the question "WHY?," because I received another letter dated just 6 days later. In the letter she wrote that why was the million dollar question.

She continued, "why did I have a miscarriage? why is my loved one ill? etc.etc. There is no answer to that question but you just have to have faith in God that He will help you through it and that He has a plan for you. "

It is so incredibly eerie as well as divine that a letter written 11 years ago by my grandmother who no longer walks this earth has such meaning right now in my life. 11 years later I am going through the things she was speaking of in her letter. Could she have known? And what made me keep those two letters?

I guess asking "WHY?" is a waste of time. I will instead bask in the love that she had for me my whole life and believe she still has as she watches from heaven. I guess I don't have to worry about her missing Alex grow up - she isn't missing a thing!

When will fall be here?

Okay, admittedly I am a little slow to this whole blogging thing. But I have a lot to say, really I do.

It has been a busy summer - we have had some great times...many weekends and a few weeks at the beach with my hubby and little man and our extended families-(alex is a beach baby to the fullest extent - thank goodness or I don't know what I'd do- the beach is my haven!) .....a trip to Vegas and one to Chicago....and a lot of time spent outside on playgrounds, in swimming pools, and in our backyard. Alex is a wild man - I always say that he is either on or off (awake or asleep) he doesn't wind up or down. So I am tired all the time, but truly loving every minute of it, except maybe when he bites another kid on the playground! Really he is a sweet kid but loves to take little nibbles out of others. Really, that needs to stop!

There have been some serious heartaches this summer. Imagine my surprise in June when I found out I was preggo without even trying (boy, was my hubby proud of himself). And imagine my heartbreak a few days later when I lost my little baby. Although I only had a few days to love the baby, my heart was so full already that it literally broke when I found out. And then a few weeks ago, my dad found out he has prostate cancer. Talk about knocking the wind out of our sails. My dad is the most amazing, hardworking, funny, loving man in all the world (okay, maybe I am a little biased, but still). He just lost his mother a year ago today ( don't even get me started on the heartbreak associated with that subject) and he just doesn't deserve this! We are very optomistic that everything is going to be fine, it seems as if he is in the early stages, but it is still scary as anything I have experienced in my 30 years. So if anyone out there prays, please pray for my dad!

I need fall to be here. I need the cool, refreshing air to help me breathe again....